The Good Wife's Guide: Embracing Your Role as a Help Meet Paperback – April 1, 2012

I’ve recently began working on becoming a better homemaker and help meet. This was a great/easy beginners read for it. Chapter 5 “Curb Appeal” was my favorite. 👍🏼

I loved this book, and it's one I'm keeping on my Kindle for awhile, rather than "archiving" - because it's one I'm going to want to refer to again and again!I quoted the above verse because to me a "word fitly spoken" is an encouraging word, and I found this book SO encouraging. To me, an encouraging word does not necessarily mean one that gives you warm fuzzies all the time. Sometimes an encouraging word is one that convicts me of an area that needs work... but then doesn't just leave me stranded feeling helpless that I've fallen short... it gives me practical ideas and HOPE of how to improve in those areas.In my mind I am very organized... back when I had just two children my household ran on clockwork and all my work was done by 10 am, and I had lots of empty hours until time to start dinner... when my children finally went to school (in the Netherlands) and I had to pick them up for lunch time and then bring them back to school in the afternoon, I had a little interesting break in my day. I know how to wash dishes, dust a room, sort the laundry, etc, etc. I used to have them all down pat.But now that we are in the States, my family has grown, and I am homeschooling five of them, my housekeeping has become... well... chaos... And since my children's education has been my primary focus, my housekeeping has suffered. I have a dear husband who has not complained, but I know from our earlier years of marriage that he truly appreciates coming home to a tidy house.I think many of us WANT to have tidy (if not spotless) homes and peaceful families, but we are overwhelmed on where to start.I love how Darlene puts everything into bite sized pieces and how she gives practical ideas to control that chaos.I love her step by step examples to organize the kitchen and other rooms.I love her ideas for scripture in different rooms to serve as an encouraging word.I love her ideas for creating a welcoming atmosphere when our husbands come home from work. I am so blessed that my husband is able to work, and that he works hard to be able to provide for me to stay home with our children and homeschool them, something I greatly enjoy doing. To show this appreciation, I truly want home to be his haven, to be his soft place to fall... not a place to come to where there is just more conflict and problems to solve, like he has at the office all day. I want to create a place that is warm and inviting. A place he misses when he's gone, a place he is eager to return to. My guy is a family man, anyway... even when the house is in chaos, he misses not being with us... but I love all the practical ideas that Darlene gives to help create that atmosphere I strive for. No, every day is not perfect. Things happen. Children miss naps and get cranky. Spills happen, messes happen, 115 lb dogs run in with big muddy feet, diapers need changing. That's to be expected. I don't reach perfection, and I'm not discouraged by not attaining it, but I love having the baseline to aim for. :)There are several other topics in this book. Each chapter has nuggets of wisdom... verses, tips, advice, and sometimes conviction as to where I might change... but then conviction tempered with love and grace and hope.

I do believe, first and foremost, that it is important to recognize that this book is written from the point of one woman who (like myself) is embroiled in the romanticized ideology surrounding the vintage 1950's housewife. This sort of traditionalism includes elements that I have come to discover are not found in other forms of Traditionalism, and which seem to be exclusive to those traditionalists who are also focused on vintage aesthetics and romanticims- particularly of the 1940's to 1960's.That traditionalist mentality may make others uncomfortable or upset due to the emphasis on traditional femininity and subservience, plus domestic perfection (even though the author clearly states she does not believe in domestic perfection and similar ideology). If these ideologies make you upset or uncomfortable, or you find them downright insulting or laughable, then this book is ultimately not (and never will be) for you.Now, on to the real meat of the review.As a Pagan woman it often distresses me that the bulk of Traditionalist material is written from a biblical and Christian standpoint. It is hard- if not entirely impossible- to find material that is from a non denominational perspective and which talks about Traditionalism from a perspective other than a biblical one. This book is- unsurprisingly- no different; it is overly heavy on the Christian tones and is very biblically and Christian oriented- something which is written so thoroughly into the book that it is impossible to skip, gloss over, or separate from the material in any way.It also often distresses me that there seems to be a war between the "modern feminist" and "traditionalist", with traditionalist materials often taking derogatory stabs at the modern woman who finds empowerment outside the home (and vice versa with the modern feminist belittling and shaming the traditionalist). This book, however, has been a breath of fresh air on this front at the very least. While the author makes clear her own beliefs and airs her own greivances with certain modern mentalities (and accusations leveled at her, as most traditionalists face) she also writes with a non-judgemental attitude not only towards Housewifes, but also towards working wives and non-traditionalist women; she makes a note to regularly include "if you do"s, making it clear that she acknowledges that some women don't- though she does sometimes fail in this. I found these areas easy to overlook, however.Still, even with the heavy Christian and traditionalist emphasis, and having to wade through it for miles to find the practical... I found the book mirrored many of my own ideals surrounding Traditionalism and being a Housewife. Even with the biblical orientation, it was filled with solid advice that benefits anyone who is looking to improve their household and marriage- whether a Traditionalist or not, working or stay at home, and so on. The second section in the book (which acts as a domestic manual) was particularly helpful and I will definitely be adopting many of the suggestions for my own home.

I bought this book for my tablet that has the kindle program on it and I gotta say it feels like you are seeing yourself through God's mirror. At times you feel so bad because you haven't been the wife that God wants you to be but you feel less pressured in knowing that God can help you to be this woman/wife that you were always meant to be. It basically pricks my heart and causes me to see my heart and how I could be better by getting rid of pride, selfishness and getting rid of all the false images of what today's society thinks a wife should be like. This book is a blessing and it has allowed me to let go and let God take control of my life and have me realize that I need to work on me before I can suggest anything to others especially my husband who is trying himself.

For all Christian wives out there, this book is a recipe to contentment and peace in life and in family. I found it in a very tough moment in my life as a mother and wife and it gave me the strength and practical advice on starting again.

It was amazing.

So rare to find a woman with such similar thinking! Great tips, for the religious wife, and even for the non religious woman too!

A great read. Very encouraging and very helpful.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book. Very detailed in cleaning and organisational tips. Great advice on being a Godly wife and mother. Would recommend to any woman whether your newly married or have been married for a long time.