Men on Strike: Why Men Are Boycotting Marriage, Fatherhood, and the American Dream - and Why It Matters Paperback – Illustrated, December 8, 2014

Thank you, Dr. Helen Smith for allowing men to have their (our) rightful voice about marriage in the 21st Century! Right off the bat: what makes this book work on so many levels is the fact that it is a book about men written by a woman. Had this book been written by a man, every feminazi and #MeToo Movement follower would have uttered ear-bleeding screams of "Sexist!", "Politically incorrect!", "Childish!", "Liars!", etc. Helen Smith calls all aspects of feminism on the carpet as she elaborates in complete necessary detail the numerous ways in which modern-day feminism has not only intimated men as people, but also backfired in terms of turning the tables on men and making them feel like second-class citizens with hell to pay for our forefathers who did not in fact do women justice in any way whatsoever...back in the day, long before more recent generations of boys and young men were conceived in the womb.But when it comes to showing the world how marriage holds very little benefit to men of today, Helen then goes on a series of insightful, moving, sincere, honest interview snippets with men from various stages, economic statuses, social outlooks, and academic standings in life all in a solid effort to show what life and marriage look like through the eyes of present-day males. Helen does not hold back in her revelations via these spotlighted men, and all throughout her "investigation" she shows that men are in fact (gasp!) people too--with real feelings that deserve to be expressed despite every horrible masculine stereotype that plagues the consciences and kills the souls of every "good man" out there.Speaking of "the good men", this is where the book becomes 100% relevant to women. While men who fit the bill feel that they/we are continually done injustices by our peers of both genders: nice guys are detested by bad-boy macho men who look down upon us and consider us an insult to the male species at large, while women dislike nice guys because of our reputation of being poor performers in bed, mama's boys, low-income earners, and flat-out weak overall. No matter how physically handsome a "good man" is on the outside, and how warm, sincere, honest, hardworking, and committed to his life, work, family, and (if his kind demeanor has not turned them away right off their shallow bat) friends, at the end of the day, he will be taken advantage of in some way by the female serving as his supposed/anticipated girlfriend-lady wife-date-crush, etc.This is where the line continually gets drawn by both men, and author-activist Helen Smith herself. We men have come to realize that American society is simply no longer in our favor. Equality between both genders has become an oxymoron--to the point where women and girls are being encouraged by everyone from their parents to schoolteachers to the media to the Internet to not only uphold their own "girl power", but also to look down on men and boys as being nothing but immature, good-for-nothing interferers in their prospective success and happiness. And with the #MeToo Movement dictating the thought process of most young women out there to the point where men and boys are immediately misconstrued as being villains simply for being born, men are quite rightly fighting back to save their lives by having NOTHING to do with the opposite sex on intimate and corresponding legal levels. Hence, why men are on strike and boycotting marriage, fatherhood, and the American Dream. Since, according to many modern day women and their support groups, men can never do anything right in the home and therefore "deserve" to receive 100% of the blame for failed relationships, why should men stick around to watch their livelihoods crumble at the hands of their female "comrades" who have everybody from the law to the classroom to the screen on their side. When women prove to their men that the only reasons they want them around is to: given them some kids, do the dirty work when called upon to do so like guard dogs, help them look good in front of their girl friends, families, co-workers, and of course on the endless stream of photos posted on social media, all in an effort to combat their self-inflicted insecurity that never seems to fade in the tiniest of ways despite valiant efforts on the part of the universe to help them feel better about themselves inside and out, then men seek refuge in our naturally independent lifestyles and enjoy the fruits of our everyday labor to stay afloat in a world that is equally unpredictable for us at it is for our female counterparts. Hence, the planting of the seeds of Men Going Their Way (MGTOW). If more women out there do not wake up and smell the coffee that they have helped brew, then the future of the American family and a well-rounded society, culture, and world as we know it (as eloquently pointed out by Helen Smith from cover to cover) is at stake.As long as nice guys are always guaranteed to finish last, why bother entering the triangular rat race of love, romance, and marriage which is rigged against them/us?

This little book is an excellent introduction to a serious problem lurking in American society. Men have been discriminated against for more than 30 years. Unnoticed is the fact that the discrimination against women, which led to the efforts to favor women in law and society, ended decades ago. I teach medical students and am well aware that the majority are now female. When I attended medical school 50 years ago, admissions committees did discriminate against female applicants because the committees, almost all male, were concerned about the perceived doctor shortage and felt that women who completed a medical education would not practice full time or would stop their practice once they had children. Today, this concern is not apparent but, interestingly enough, female physicians do tend to limit their hours and a recent study by a physician recruitment firm noted that female physicians work significantly fewer hours per week than their male colleagues who also work fewer hours than my generation did.We are well past the era of discrimination against women but you would not know it from the newspapers or TV or academia. Dr Smith recounts her experience, not only from her practice as a clinical psychologist, but from interviewing men in the environs where they lurk and by e-mail and in comments on her blog. After reading her book, I would say, without getting into detail, that I see many examples from my own life.She begins with a chapter on why men seem to be avoiding marriage. Here she interviews young men who are members of several subsets, including "gamers" and men at gyms and in bars. A lot of this is related to the sexual revolution in which men can get sex without marriage. When I was a college student, that was rare and men and women tended to marry earlier in life. It certainly was a motivation for both of us as women feared pregnancy and were very reluctant to risk it. Legal abortion and the birth control pill changed all this.One additional factor is the change in society's attitude toward women who have children out of wedlock. The fact that women have less to fear from societal disapproval doesn't reduce the legal consequences for the father, or at least the putative father. She has a lengthy discussion of paternity law and the surprising (and often infuriating) results of DNA testing. She recounts many cases in which the man ordered to pay child support was not the father but this did not reduce his obligation. There are a number of cases in which a husband learned that his wife's children were not fathered by him.She has a chapter about the war on men in college. My sons attended college over 20 years ago and I don't believe they encountered this. I certainly didn't but it is a major problem now. Sexual harassment charges are being leveled at men and they are being denied simple legal protection.She discusses the issue of the marginalization of husbands and fathers who are being relegated to "man caves," often a basement or garage where they must keep their "stuff" or see it banned from the rest of the house. I can recall from my own experience having derogatory remarks made about my "I love me wall." This was a space for photos and plaques from my own life. Fortunately, I had already been through my second divorce and ignored the complaint. I did notice efforts to ease my "stuff" to a small office and it took some push back to avoid the "man cave" effect. I now live alone with a basset hound and hear no complaints.Her later chapters cover why women, and society in general, should be worried about this. I am grateful that my two sons are old enough to have missed this in school and seem to have survived with their male instincts intact. I have some reservations about whether society can be shifted back to even keel anytime soon. Several of my female medical students invited me to a presentation of "Vagina Monologues" a few years ago at the school. I thanked them and declined. Both have since married and I was invited to the weddings. I do wonder how that is working out.Some years ago, there was a movement to support the concept that a wife was entitled to half the husband's lifetime earning if she had worked while he was in school. This came up at a medical association convention, brought up by female students and doctors in training. I got the floor and asked if it had ever occurred to them that they could be the victims of similar action by estranged husbands. The matter never got any farther. Sanity returned.I recommend this little book highly as it focused my own vague disquiet about male-female relations on certain facts, many of which were unknown to me as I am 75 years old and past the war of the sexes. I am content to live alone but married twice and paid the price although I love my children.