Trapped in the Mirror Kindle Edition

I wish I could leave an un-starred comment instead of having to assign a rating this book.This book is -horrifically- outdated. It contains narrow-minded, hateful opinions regarding human sexuality that have long-since been discarded. On that basis alone, this book should be retired. Its tone is pompous and arrogant, and it doesn't offer much real-world help.That said, there are plenty of points in it that made me feel much MUCH better and less alone. The author was in my head, saying things I didn't realize I thought and suffered for decades. In that respect, it is a marvelous book for those who need some self-analysis and support.If it were updated, it'd be a clear no-brainer for anyone dealing with these issues. As it is, it can only be recommended to readers who can ignore / cast-off sections that should be relegated to the dustbin of history and its ignorant hatreds and garbage opinions.

It's true, this book is somewhat dated (or maybe even a LOT dated) in its expression of some of the author's opinions, but that doesn't make it untrue about a lot of other things. I found myself pretty amazed at some of the descriptions of the author's own interactions with her parents, having gone through similar things with my own. I guess for those who are not just discovering "wow, other people have actually been through this same thing...." it may seem stupid, but for me it was pretty eye-opening and felt good to know there were other people who had felt the same way as I have and had.The latter chapters helped me to see that a lot of the hiding from people that I do is shared by other children of narcissists and that I don't have to feel ashamed of myself. There are some almost poetic parts of this book. It's not the plain language, tell-it-like-it-is normal self-help type book, but the unique aspects of this book really resonated with me and left me feeling more hopeful, not less so.Yes, life can be a dark journey and this book focuses on the more painful aspects. If you're easily triggered or want something that gives you concrete steps to help yourself, you might want to look elsewhere.

I was looking for books on this subject but this book reads more like a self indulgent tell-all with the intent of driving home her grievances with her family.As an ex nurse I found her descriptions of her Aunt Sara in a long term care facility were enough to call into question her observational skills. It was difficult to read and didn’t relate to lists facility realities I’ve seen over the years.The author was very judgemental. There was clear instances of fat shaming. The way the author wrote about people bridges on mean.If you are looking for a book on dealing with narcissistic parents, this won’t be too much help. If you can struggle through the tortured text, you might get a sense of camaraderie.For me it read so judgmental and petty I had a hard time finishing it.

This is more of a memoir and collection of stories of patients. The common thread is horrid narcissistic parents creating wounded adults, who often make self-destructive choices. But if you are seeking specific advice on overcoming such a childhood, this is not the book for you. In fact, in the epilogue, the author basically discusses why she does not feel she should offer specific suggestions. The book is not well edited, and some stories are repeated. There is no real building of conclusions. There are personal details of the author's life, of friend's lives, of relative's of friends and of patients.

As many of the one star reviews say this book is highly judgmental and negative. I kept thinking there were unnecessary irrelevant details added to some of the stories written mostly about her friends. When I got to the first chapter which mentioned her views regarding sexuality, I had to check the date of when the book was written, as I knew it couldn't be anything from the last decade or so. I was upset already from some of the negative judgments in the previous chapters and as I read from here on out, I started getting more upset. I felt as though I was reading something written by an internet troll at times, as some of the phrases seemed similar to those that a troll would use to elicit strong emotional responses meant to upset. There was definitely fat shaming, using phrases such as "layer of blubber" which is a phrase I feel is meant to disgust the reader. At the point I got to the chapter actually on obesity, I was over the top upset and done. Angry that this wasn't really a self help book, the stories contained unnecessary irrelevant details about people/their lives that seemed meant to demonize versus being relevant to understanding the persons as being a narcissist, or I'd actually rather say, a troubled person themselves with their own issues/problems.Narcissism as I know it is a spectrum, that actually most humans fall somewhere on and Narcissistic Personality Disorder is something of it's own -- so I got confused when reading since every person in each story was referred to as a narcissist and I then wondered if they meant NPD or just higher on the spectrum? They also mentioned at one point all children of narcissistic parents are narcissistic, not verbatim, I can't remember exact phrasing. Though I was surprised it wasn't worded as "higher in narcissism", as chapters before it was said that most people are to some extent narcissistic in our society today. It was stated that we don't know if our modern society is the reason or if we are the reason for a narcissistic society. Nonetheless, I also realized at one point I was reading a book by someone who must be higher on the spectrum of narcissism compared to the average person to write so much in a negative judgmental hateful way that lacked a lot of empathy in my opinion. It was as if they wanted the reader to take their side against whomever they were writing about. I wonder what would have been the actual unconscious psychological intention of the author writing this.I have also learned more than a few times that people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder don't choose to be that way and it's not their fault. I even saw a show while sitting in a dentist's chair last week, where the host said people are starting to think the disorder or symptoms start as early as in childhood. So I don't feel it right to negatively judge them or demonize them, thus what I actually need are books to help me recover from my past with one (that's what I thought this would be), tips/etc on how to handle interactions in the future etc. and even how to see red flags/avoid them, just because how they are isn't a choice or their fault, some of us still have to recover from our pasta and protect ourselves here on out from people such as them.

To be honest, then I have skipped parts.But this really is one of the better books about narcissism.It stays earthbound.It keeps to a minimum of any form or type of psychological school terms, "jargon", which may be difficult to translate.There is not one single diagram that may only make true sense in creators view, altho I liked them, then it can be just as good without. Tho there are written analogys, which I like.It is rather free from the viewpoint that narcissists only are blood sucking vampires, monsters, which some other books like to paint, therefor making it rather hard to recongnize compared to real life, and perhaps instilling a sort of paranoid fear, on the lookout for horns and pointy teeth, when infact you should be paying attention to and looking for something else perhaps, maybe yourself also.There is a good amount of accounts from others, cases and history.

I seriously had to pinch myself to stay awake during this book as the writer went on needlesly about how she felt. I lost count how many times the word 'I' was used. It seems to me that her objective was to write an autobiography as a form of therapy as she is clearly not over her traumatic past: being raised by narcissists. There are quite a few conradictions in there as well for good measure and just when you thought you'd had your fill of book-bordeom she even delights us with the pleasure of sharing the experience of her first oragsm. Worth a smiss I think.

Good resource for people working through narcissistic abuse. Some really thought provoking real world examples used to illustrate concepts which was powerful in understanding the context of the narcissistic abuse. Somewhat bibliographic in places, however, this book provided some useful information for understanding examples of styles of delivery of the abuse, which can help readers reflect on their own experiences and become more enlightened. A valuable read.

I read the other reviews before reading this book. During the first half, I wondered what everyone was talking about as it seemed to give a very powerful explanation and descriptions of living with narcissism. About half way through though the writing falls apart. Towards the end she tells you that she suffered a head injury during the writing of the book, which may well explain the patchy writing.Overall though the first half and the end carry it through IMHO and it is a valuable though often repetetive description of the problem of narcissism in our society.

Easy to read.