A Dutiful Boy: A memoir of secrets, lies and family love (Winner of the LAMBDA 2021 Literary Award for Best Gay Memoir/Biography)

The book came before the website said it would and it is in a really good condition for a used book.

This is a coming-out story of a middle-class Pakistani Brit who faces racism and homophobia, but makes it to Oxford and beyond as a successful lawyer. It is a wonderful read with touching moments, and highly recommended.It is also timely, given that Muslims everywhere are coping with how to manage individual rights in closely-knit communities and traditional histories. The authors' family accepts him, which makes his situation exceptional. He is public and yet upwardly mobile, which again makes him a modern example and an exception. Such voices deserve to be heard and celebrated, as they pave the way forward.

Compared to this author, I am an old man. I grew up as a white, conservative Evangelical Christian in Australia in the fifties and sixties, yet the pressures I faced with my family, my church, my faith and my culture were remarkably similar. To accept my homosexuality was just as difficut for me as it was for the author of this book. Just as he did I prayed desperately to be cured, and just as Allah failed to answer him , so my Christian God failed to answer me. I loved this book. I hope and pray it will help young Muslim kids growing up gay, trans, or lesbian. It's beautifully written too. I commend the author for his courage and honesty. Read it and be moved.

Pleasant read/fascinating memoir. The damage love can inflict and the identity it can demean is painfully on view in this book

A Dutiful Boy takes the reader through a young man’s coming of age journey of warmth despite angst, of heartache amidst joy. It ultimately leads us to the writer’s discovery of love - love of family, love of experience, and love of self. I was captivated from the start and cried (more than I care to admit) from both a place of excited joy and heart-wrenching empathy. Mr. Zaidi’s storytelling, vulnerability, and warmth make his very personal trials and successes relatable to all hearts and minds. From a first time author, all I can say is thank you and give me more!

I have read dozens of coming out stories in the last 30 years, and was someone reluctant what has become a tired genre. After all, do we really need another coming out story in 2020? And yet, “A Dutiful Boy” may be the best Coming Out story since Paul Monette’s “Becoming a Man”.

Transparent and emotionally moving. An intimate look into the personal, family, cultural and religious struggles to overcome prejudice and conditioning. Inspiring.

Captivating and powerful. A glimpse into the struggles of being gay and Muslim told through simple prose and deep honesty.

I absolutely loved it. Reminded me of my own struggles with being gay, in apartheid South Africa and then having to deal with parents who were not accommodating at all! Being told that they would have preferred it if I had told them I was a drug addict, was the saddest thing to deal with. All the anxieties and stress he had to deal with, I have know and experienced. It was hard and frustrating for him as it is for a lot of gay people. It was hard to read. The struggle has made me the person I am today. Happy. Content. And happily married. I thought the book was extraordinary! It was very sad as well. I LOVED IT. Thank you Mohsin. From Mario.

I don’t usually leave book reviews or even bother but this book and his story is something different. As a gay male Pakistani from a similar background it’s almost shocking to know the lack of similar stories being publicised. I was shocked/ relieved at how many experiences both cultural and personal life I shared with the author and for years I have always thought I was the only one. Anyone struggling with coming out, at an early stage of thinking about their sexuality, or even dealing with cultural shock and challenges of living in western society whilst trying to maintain their South Asian influences needs to read this book and take a chance to understand the story and know that you’re not the only one. It’s also made me realise it’s so important to speak out!I talked to my mum about my life, struggles of dealing with our culture and my sexuality - after reading this book and also told her about the authors story and which made me story seem so much less agonising and a lot more understandable for her.I also cried few too many time than I’d like to admit and laughed at random moments but it’s only because the story is so moving!Mohsin thank you so much for writing this and the impact this has had on my life is immeasurable and I’m sure it will positively impact the lives of countless others.

READ THIS IF... you enjoy memoir, like coming out and coming of age stories, and are ready to get emotional.THE STORY... Mohsin takes us from his childhood, through years of self loathing due to the conflict between his culture and his sexuality, to the present where he is openly gay to the world and, most importantly, his family.I WAS... excited by this book as soon as I heard about it. The writing was easy to follow and I loved reading a book with shorter chapters as I liked to read this in between work and chores, and take a break after each chapter to take it in.It was the perfect mix of heartfelt and humorous - one chapter I’d be welling up at the words of his therapist, and the next I’d be laughing out loud at Mohsin questioning why ‘All I Want For Christmas’ was playing at a gay bar in June! (Side note: it is always an appropriate song to play, especially in a gay bar!) I was particularly struck by Mohsin not being able to find the books he needed in Oxford University’s library, because he’d never been taught how to read Roman Numerals. This so succinctly showed the alienation that occurs at Oxbridge, places that weren’t designed for Mohsin, and many others like him. There’s so many parts of the book I want to unpack, but I don’t want to give too much away!The message I took away from this book was the importance of community - whether that’s friends or family, your religion, culture, or the LGBT+ community.NOW... I would recommend this to everyone as essential reading. I am glad that I now know Mohsin’s story, as being a member of the LGBT+ community (and someone with very happy - if slightly blurry - memories of attending London Pride, which he has been heavily involved with), I feel humbled by his commitment to improving LGBT+ lives, and indebted to him for this.

This is an excellent book: a good story, well-told. At the same time, while there is a happy ending, it is incomplete. For what is left unresolved is the author's relation to Islam. While I am sure that young Muslims who feel same-sex attraction will find it moving and encouraging (and while everyone should find it an enjoyable read), there seemed to me an elephant still in the room, of the issue about religion. Perhaps another book from this first-rate author, on this?

An engaging read, well crafted, even if, honestly, it is not Proust (nor Barbara Cartland). Our London-born, comprehensive kid gets to Oxford where his life is transformed. He finds love... on page 273, so there are a few vicissitudes.The problem is our Muslim hero realises he’s gay, and finds it excruciatingly difficult to admit it to himself or others: "For gays, I was too Muslim. For Muslims, I was too gay. For whites, I was too brown, and for my family, I was too white" (221). Actually, his "dreadful" family, first his uncle, but then his two brothers, turn out to be more supportive than he feared. The problem is that the narrator, by now a distinguished lawyer, presents himself as an ingénu, ignorant as he grows up of what everyone else knows.But it is a moving story — I cried three times — and saw something of myself in him (London, comprehensive, Oxford, Gay), which is probably presumptuous, because he’s a lot better looking.